Expect one-liners, impersonations, puns, accents, crazy stories and other romantic activities.

QED Astoria ─ a bar/performance space that hosts everything from trivia contests to poetry slams to cabaret shows ─ will present Date Night on Wednesday, Dec. 4, at 7:30 p.m.

First, the set up. Admission is $10, but there’s a buy-one-get-one-free deal for all couples. So if Romeo purchases a ticket, Juliet goes for free!

Now, the punch line. The program features comedy by those involved in relationships only. Some sweethearts will swap jokes on the stage. Other jokesters will perform sets written by their beloveds. One Casanova is going to sing a funny song. (Maybe it’ll be like Kanye and Kim doing shtick.)

The lineup includes several professional comics and joke writers. Here’s the schedule.

Couples working together:
Jess Salomon (The Tonight Show) and Eman El Husseini (Just For Laughs)
Emily Winter (TODAY Show) and Chris Calogero (Funny Or Die)
Babe Parker (MTV) and Leo Martin (Neato Bedito)

Individuals performing their significant others’ material:
Will Watkins (Zeroes On Heroes Podcast)
Patrick Hastie (SF Sketchfest)
Morgan Miller (The Yoga Room)

Musical comedy:
Max Ash (Upright Citizen’s Brigade)

At other times, Dan Ahrens (Nickelodeon) and Hattie Hayes (Martha Stewart) will organize board games and other bonding activities that were popular before the invention of the cell phone.

Sounds like Date Night is the perfect event for a blind date.

QED Astoria is located at 27-16 23rd Ave.

Image: Eman El Husseini

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