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Teen Talk: Dating should not take center stage in teen life

By Kohar Bayizian

As we approach our late teen years, the idea of dating is becoming more prominent in our lives. The pressure to have romantic connections with the opposite sex has heightened tremendously.

We can observe this in our everyday lives. Just by walking through the halls of your schools or down the street, you can see teenagers are indeed engaging in intimate relations with members of the opposite gender. Children as young as 13 and 14 are talking about boyfriends and girlfriends.

But is this the healthiest thing? Shouldn’t they be playing hide-and-seek or make-believe? It seems that teenagers are rushing out of their childhood, as though it is something passé.

It’s funny how you are sometimes blind while you are in a given situation, but after it has passed it becomes so clear. I guess that’s how it is while you are in the early teenage years — you can’t see how nice it is until you’re on your way out and onto becoming an adult.

I worry about society and the standards that are set for us. It seems as though if you don’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend then you aren’t cool enough for the superficial clubbing crowds that are consuming most of the hip “it” scenes. Is it wrong to believe there is more to life than finding a boyfriend or girlfriend? The answer is no, and you would be a fool to think otherwise.

We should be focusing on our own lives. With so many pressures that victimize us every day, we should not fall under the influence of yet another.

We are about to start the life process of finding out who we are, to begin our quest for belonging and to experience all the things that make us human beings.

We are at the age where we are slowly breaking away from our family oriented lives and attempting to establish our own. But if we surround ourselves by one person, like so many I know have, how are we to grow, especially when teenage love is here today, gone tomorrow? Why take the risk of basing happiness on something so unreliable, so unstable?

In my limited experience in the dating world, I have learned many lessons, but the one that can be related to almost every aspect of my life is that nothing is for sure. Things can change in a matter of minutes, even seconds. So, never take anything for granted.

I once read an article that asked readers, “Wouldn’t it be nice to go back to a time when pain meant a scraped knee, a lollipop meant happiness, everyone was your best friend and boys still had the cooties?”

So next time you find yourself contemplating a serious relationship, remember this quote and enjoy the days of joyous innocence while they still exist.

Kohar Bayizian is a high school senior and a City-as-School intern with the TimesLedgernewspapers.