Putting together a wedding list seems pretty simple. You and your significant other make up a list of family and close friends. Then you ask each of your parents for their lists.
Everyone has heard a story or two of family and friends that have been offended for not being invited to a party or for not being invited with a date. In many cases I have personally been confused as to why that would happen or how the host of a party could not make room for one more person. But reality has quickly set in for Tracey and I as we began formulating our wedding list.
It is not easy for us and our wedding plans because we have four sets of parents, a lot of friends, co-workers, clients and in Tracy’s case a large extended family. Just as a base Tracey and I each have about 13 people in our bridal parties.
A few weeks ago I was told that we needn’t worry as in most cases approximately 20 percent of the people you invite will not attend. While talking it over with one of my friends I mentioned that statistic to him and he expressed to me that that was exactly what he was told when he invited 320 people to his wedding. Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on who and how you are looking at it, 315 of those invited attended!
So the bottom line is that you never know and it best to assume that most people will attend. Besides, I like to think that no one would want to miss our wedding!
Time is on our side, but as the list keeps growing and growing we realize that we have to make cuts or else a) not everyone would fit in the venue and b) we would not be able to stay within our budget.
I’m the kind of person who likes to be liked, but sometimes you don’t have a choice. It is a good lesson of working together with your significant other as we are going to have to communicate with each other and both make decisions that will been seen as sacrifices. It will be interesting to see how our family plays into it as well. I am very optimistic and don’t think we’ll have any problems, but surprisingly for me this will probably be the most stressful part of the planning.
So if you are reading this column and are not invited . . . don’t take it personally. You’ll hopefully understand where I am coming from and know that I love you anyway!