By Alex Berger
There is only one happiness in life Ð to love and be loved. Ð George SandA kiss is a reminder that two heads are better than one. – Colin FarrellFebruary 14th is Valentine's Day, a day to love, be loved and feel romantic. However, throughout history, it was not so easy being in love. This was especially true during the reign of Roman Emperor Claudius II. The empire was at war and Claudius had forbidden his Roman soldiers to get engaged or married. He was convinced that, once betrothed, the men would prefer to stay at home with their wives and families than go off and fight. Whether or not the emperor was correct in his reasoning, his cruel law stood, stymying thousands of Roman inamoratas. A blind priest named Valentine took pity on the passionate, love-starved and long-suffering men. He defied the emperor's decree and married many of the young lovers in secret. In the year 270, he was arrested, imprisoned, and beheaded on February 14. In honor of the sympathetic priest, the date of his execution became St. Valentine's Day. This event also authorized romantics to “lose their heads” over the ones they love. Some disagree and say the origin of St. Valentine's Day goes back to biblical times and the source Ð Adam and Eve. God finished creating Adam in the late afternoon, just before the onset of Eve. From the moment of his creation, Adam began walking around the Garden of Eden feeling lonely. God asked him what the problem was. Adam replied, “I want a companion. Someone, preferably of the opposite sex, who would be my Valentine. I would call her 'woman' because that name has a sexy ring to it. “This woman would cook for me and wash my clothes. She would agree with every decision I make. She would bear my children and never ask me to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She would not nag me and she would always be the first to admit she was wrong when we have a disagreement. She would never have a headache, and she would give me love and passion whenever I need it. “What would a woman like this cost?” Adam asked. “Only an arm and a leg.” “What can I get for a rib?” inquired Adam, and the rest is history. And, thusly so, it was written that God created the first “woman” for Adam. (Did you know that scientists believe that the creating of Eve was the first splitting of the Adam)? Adam lovingly inspected his prize from head to foot, aft to stern, and nook and cranny. He asked God, “Why did you make her so beautiful?” “To get you interested. But I also gave her a sweet personality so you would fall in love with her, and added a little crassness so she would fall in love with you.” Nonetheless, Adam was happy with God's newest creation. He never had to listen to her talk about all the other guys she could have married and, there was no mother-in-law to invite over for the holidays. But, alas and alack, there was trouble in paradise. Adam turned to Eve and said, “You were created only yesterday Ð and already you have a headache.” Eve asked Adam if he loved her. “Of course, who else?” Some biblical historians consider the apple Eve gave to Adam to be the original non-verbal valentine greeting. But, I think that an apple was an inappropriate gift for Adam to have offered Eve on that very first Valentine's Day. If I ever gave Gloria an apple on St. Valentine's Day, it would be Moving Day. He should at least given her something a little more sentimental Ð like a pineapple. Incidentally, I first met Gloria on Feb. 22 (George Washington's birthday), eight days after Valentine's Day. I was lucky. That stroke of good timing saved me the price of a Valentine's Day card. We married six months later and began exchanging the same Valentine cards each year.I give Gloria an alphabetical one stating that she is – Adorable, Beguiling, Charismatic, Delightful, Elegant, Fascinating, Glorious, Heavenly, Imaginative, Joyous, Keen, Lively, Magnificent, Neat, Opulent, Priceless, Quintessential, Sensual, Terrific, Wonderful, X-traordinary, Youthful, and Zestful. She reciprocates with a card of stating if she could rearrange the alphabet for me, “U” and “I” would be together. Don't you agree these two cards are the best Valentine greetings anyone could ever receive? A favorite Valentine's story involves the stage actress, Helen Hayes, and her husband, Charles McArthur. When they married on Valentine's Day, he gave her a bag of peanuts and said, “I wish it were a bag of diamonds.” On their 50th wedding anniversary, he gave her a bag of diamonds and said, “I wish it were a bag of peanuts.” St. Valentine's Day is not a legal holiday, nor in most churches is it a religious holiday. Yet, it is a very important day in our personal calendars. So, hug, smooch and kiss that someone special. Go on and tell that person how much he or she means to you. Remember, as David Viscott said, “To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides.”In this weather, everyone could use the extra warmth. And if this column does the trick, don't forget to invite Gloria and me to the wedding.Gloria and I now want to wish one and all this Valentine greeting, “Ich Liebe Dich” (German); “Se Agapo” (Greek); “Ich Liebdier ” (Yiddish); “Tu Amore” (Italian); “Je T'aime” (French); “Te Amo”) Spanish); “Ik Houn Van J'oun” (Dutch); and “Seni Sevi Yorrum” (Turkish). In other words, “I Love You.” Have a happy Valentine of love and do something heart-warming for a neighbor in need.Reach Alex Berger at timesledger@aol.com or call 718-229-0300, Ext. 157.
