By Alex Berger
Everyone knows I am the world's greatest holiday man. Each month, I try to devote a column about most holidays that occur during the month on or close to the date the holiday falls on.
But what am I to do in September, when Ramadan, the first day of school and Grandparents Day knock heads with the start of fall, Rosh Hashanah and others — not to mention Gloria's (and my) wedding anniversary in my four weekly columns?
Well, I will do as the confectioner does when making a malted milk: unite the ingredients in a splendid mix. Hang on to your hats!
On Sept. 2, children (and teacher Gloria) began school, but everything has changed. A poor report card used to mean a child was lazy, inattentive, bad and not very bright (just like his father). A poor report card today means the teacher is lazy, inattentive, bad and not very bright (just like the principal).
I remember when my teacher wrote that I was the worst-behaved child in class: I talked dirty, always fought and abused the teacher. But she gave me an A for perfect attendance. Incidentally, I would have passed that final exam, but the boy who sat in front of me was out sick.
Grandparents Day occurred Sept. 7 and, being one of the breed, I would be remiss if I did not mention it. As a child, I was fascinated by my grandfather's false teeth and kept asking him to remove them. But he never took off his nose, not even once.
Having four grandchildren hardly makes me feel old — it is knowing that I am married to a grandmother. When I became a grandfather, I stopped growing at both ends and began growing in the middle. Many grandparents have retired, but it takes them all day to do nothing. “Dear God, my Grandpa says you were around when he was a little boy. How far back do you go? Love, Dennis.”
Sept. 22, is the autumnal equinox, the instant when the sun crosses the equator heading toward the Southern Hemisphere. Day and night are both 12 hours long, marking the long, darkening slide into winter. In days of yore (and mine), pagan festivals and “Shine on Harvest Moon” celebrations were the order of the day.
As I speak, many Asian cultures are celebrating the Autumn Moon Festival at the time when the moon is at the fullest and brightest. For the occasion, I offer a well-deserved toast to autumn:
Here's to Eve, the mother of our race:
She hung some leaves over a very personal place.
Here's to Adam, the father of us all:
Imagine his delight when the leaves begin to fall.
A new football season began for my beloved, world champion New York Giants. Call me a fanatic, but watching the underdog Giants in Phoenix win the Super Bowl Feb. 3 against the favored New England Patriots — considered the best football team ever — was a religious experience.
It inspired me to believe that anything is possible if you steadfastly pursue a goal with diligence, fortitude, patience and determination. In life, as in football, you will not go very far unless you first determine where the goalposts are.
The religious holidays of Rosh Hashanah and Ramadan cross one another in September.
At sundown Sept. 29, the blowing of the shofar (ram's horn) will be sounded in synagogues to inspire a spiritual awakening, marking the start of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish new year of 5769.
According to tradition, on this holiday God judges people and determines their fate for the coming year. The occasion is spent in contemplation and sharing dinners with family and friends. As a symbol of hope for a sweet year, it is customary to dip apples in honey and eat other sweet food.
The High Holy Days will culminate in the observance of Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement, at sundown Oct. 8. Gloria and I wish all our Jewish readers “L'Shanah Tovah” (happy new year) and a very sweet year.
The first day of Ramadan began Sept. 2. It is a one-month, Islamic holiday devoted to strict religious observances and fasting from sunrise to sundown.
According to Islam, this religious observance celebrates the time when the prophet Muhammad received the teachings which became the Koran. The angel Gabriel revealed God's word to Muhammad, which he memorized and dictated to scribes.
During this holy period, let me wish my Muslim readers an inspiring and memorable holiday.
Contact Alex Berger at news@timesledger.com.
