By Kenneth Kowald
I hope the ghost of Lady Caroline Lamb, one of Lord Byron’s lovers, will forgive me if I rephrase her comments about that great poet to characterize Gov. Andrew Cuomo.
“Smart, Tart and Watch Your Back” — not quite as elegant as Lady Caroline’s words — seem to me to apply to this son of Queens.
Or would he prefer “Sun,” like the Sun King? But I digress.
He was born here, attended St. Gerard’s School and Archbishop Molloy High School and, after more education at Fordham University and Albany Law School, it was hey, hey and away we go. He is ours and we forgive him for anything, don’t we?
Andrew is smart. He is tart.
Just don’t get in his way.
His father, former Gov. Mario Cuomo, is a child of Queens, too, but my snarky comments about the figlio do not apply to the padre. The Democratic Hamlet is a much-respected figure.
While our Andrew has done lots of good stuff as governor and will probably continue to do so in his second term — yes, I am making a prediction … Astorino who? — he will certainly do it his way or it will not get done.
As a son of Queens, he is well-acquainted with the political shenanigans that have gone on here, seemingly on all levels of government, for decades and on a non-partisan basis. Corruption is not partisan. Of course, that kind of thing is systemic throughout the state.
Which is why Andrew appointed a Moreland Commission to show us the way to less corrupt government. We all threw our sweaty nightcaps in the air and shouted “Hooray!” because, after all, everybody — including the governor himself — would be subject to scrutiny.
Andrew made that clear.
Or so he said.
From the start, it seems anytime the commission came close to something dealing with the governor himself, it was soon off the table. It happened again and again.
Finally, Andrew had enough. He fired the whole group. It was “his” commission, after all, and he could do what he wanted with it. This, however, he has posited, was not “interference.” In heaven’s name, people, how could he interfere with his own commission?
Orwellian perhaps, but Andrew is, after all, erudite.
That is not what he said when he appointed it, but it is what he meant, see?
Reminds me of Humpty Dumpty’s remark to Alice in “Through the Looking Glass”: “When I use a word, it means what I choose it to mean — neither more nor less …. The question is, which is to be master — that’s all.”
Of course, I will not debate our Andrew on this matter. After all, he considers that many debates are “a disservice to democracy.” He has not always thought or acted that way, but, gee whiz!, it is part of growing up, isn’t it?
But there was a clarification about that remark at a rally in Flushing Sept. 7. He said he meant it as a joke. Maybe he is preparing for a new career as a stand-up comedian after he retires from government. Merry Andrew.
Perhaps he has had a Teachout moment — forgive the pun — when more than a third of the Democrats who voted in the primary chose someone else. On the other hand, our Andrew seems better at giving messages than receiving them.
So watch your backs, New Yorkers. We will have four more years of a smart human being. We will hear him many times. He will be tart. He will be erudite. Listen closely.
It reminds me of many years ago, when the bright wife of a major Queens political leader, who did not suffer fools lightly, was being talked to at length by a not-bright politician. I was in the small group around her. She was silent, even after he finished his long, rambling account.
Finally, he said, “You’re not listening to me.”
She answered with a wicked smile, “I heard everything you said. I’m just not paying any attention.”
Smart, tart and watch your back, whoever you are. Andrew, you are one of ours and we love you, in spite of it all.
Don’t we?
Read my blog, No Holds Barred, at timesledger.com.
